Social Anxiety and the Menopause
When I went for lunch with my friends the other day, two of them (who are peri and post menopausal) were talking about how they suddenly feel anxious about going to social gatherings. Historically, these are probably two of the most sociable people I know, so this is a big issue for them and completely out of character. So it got me thinking that maybe some of you out there might like to know more about social anxiety and the menopause, especially with the party season upon us…
What happens during the peri-menopause years
Our incredible minds are what differentiate us from other creatures. We have the unique abilities to reason, think abstract thoughts, and experience deep emotion. But sometimes our emotions get the better of us and take us to dark or un-settling places. This can obviously happen at any time in your life, but in particular many women find they have anxiety for the first time during the peri-menopause years (the 5-10 years before they stop their periods). A lot of women start to feel insignificant, un-noticed, irritable, low mood, depressed and have a lack of self-esteem and confidence during these years and this can lead to social anxiety.
So why is this happening?
It is not known for sure why this happens, but several studies suggest that it is the huge fluctuations in one type of oestrogen (estrodial) that causes the issue. And this does make sense as oestrogen works closely with serotonin which is our happy hormone. So it makes sense that when our oestrogen levels are unsettled, so too is our mood. Also, poor sleep quality and low self-esteem and low-confidence are also common for women during peri-menopause.
Unfortunately it is not as simple as saying, here, have some oestrogen and then you will produce enough serotonin to make you happy. It is different from woman to woman and from day to day. This is evident when we look at PMT throughout our lives. We have ups and we have downs. Although HRT certainly can help a lot of women.
We are able to predict to some degree, however, which women will get low mood and anxiety during peri-menopause. Things that will unfortunately put you at higher risk. If you…
- suffered from PMT when you were younger
- had post-natal depression
- had any kind of trauma when you were a child (and possibly in adulthood too)
- have suffered from any kind of anxiety/depression in the past, ever
Unfortunately, the changes during the menopause mean you are more likely to suffer with it again.
What can I do to help my anxiety during peri-menopause?
But just because you are higher risk, and even if you are not and find yourself with anxiety, there are things you can do to help minimise all your symptoms. Basic health and lifestyle changes can make a huge difference. Here are my recommendations:
- Eat a healthy balanced, hormone balancing diet. Think about getting all your macro nutrients in (protein, fats and carbs) and tons and tons of vegetables which should give you your vitamins and minerals! Especially green ones. Avoid sugar and alcohol – I know they taste good and make you feel good, but it’s temporary and in the long run make things worse 🙁 If you’d like help with this please sign up for my next 21 Day Reset that starts in January.
- Make sure you are not overloading your life. Constant stress and ‘busy-ness’ can exacerbate menopause symptoms (see this blog for further info on this)
- Exercise Regularly. Yes, I know you have heard it a million times before. If you are not exercising now, you need to start ASAP. I don’t say this to stress you out, but to help you face reality. If you are over 35 you need to be exercising. Your body will no longer be fit and healthy with no help from you. And that includes your mind. Exercise is a great stress reliever and can also help with some menopause symptoms and confidence levels. I cover all the sorts of exercise you need as part of my Holding Back the Years membership programme, so that you don’t have to think about it. Just sign up and join in!
- Get a good nights sleep! Yes, definitely easier said than done. But a good night’s sleep makes the world of difference to how much you feel like tackling the world. So do all you can to make this happen. Matthew Walker is a neuroscientist who specialises in sleep and is a great person to follow for tips.
- Get dressed up in clothes that make you feel good, put make-up on and do your hair. There is nothing quite like feeling like you are looking great to give you that self-confidence back. This can be for a night out, but it can also just be every single day. Make an effort with yourself and that effort will help your self-esteem ten-fold.
When you have all these things in place, then hopefully you won’t feel that anxiety. But even if you do, you will be better placed to face situations and get through them. Especially social ones, where usually once you get there, it is never as bad as you think it’s going to be. And hopefully you actually have fun – fingers crossed!
Have a Happy Christmas everyone!
